Category Archives: Mothering

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Launching a Teen Into Adult Life—Is Like Launching a Canoe

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If you’re in the long process of launching a teen into adult life, you know the wobbly, unstable feeling.

launching a teen

Your teen’s about to embark on a journey that’s going to be exciting.

It’ll be a combination of breathtaking beauty and—at certain times—hair-raising, adrenaline-skyrocketing danger.

The safely of the shoreline is no place to spend the rest of your life, and so your teen has to go.

Launching a teen into adult life can feel like launching a canoe.

It’s a time of transition.

You hold the gunwales while the child you love goes from standing confidently on solid ground, to placing one foot on a wobbly, unstable surface.

Then stepping gingerly—holding on—trying to find balance, trying to get to a seat without tipping.

Sometimes this canoe holds multiple teens all doing this at the same time, with scant experience or skill, their every move throwing your whole family off balance one way, and then another.

Launching a teen can be like launching a canoe—for 7 years.

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Debt-Free College Training—Fast and Easy

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Watch just one of the short, succinct video trainings below, and you’ll be on the fast track to getting the kids you love through college debt-free. 

debt-free college

If you’ve got a bright, capable middle schooler or high schooler headed for college—you’re probably wondering, “How are we going to pay for that?”

You’re especially thinking this if your kid isn’t a likely candidate for scholarships, you haven’t saved for college, and you make too much money to get government financial aid. (Or you think you do.)

You absolutely don’t want mountains of student loan debt for the kids you love.

Is there hope for getting your kids through college debt-free?

Yes.

But you’ll need someone to guide you.

Your journey toward debt-free college starts right here, right now.

Watch just one of the short videos below, and you’ll get a jump-start on getting the kids you love through college debt-free, and into jobs they love afterward.

Watch, and then share with the friends who’ll be with you on this journey.

(These fun, informal videos were made in the studio where I record my podcasts, but they are not technically podcast episodes. You can find Episode 1 of my podcast here.)

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Having Marijuana in this Form is a Felony

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With all the national conversation around legalizing marijuana, many teens are jumping to the uninformed conclusion that it’s low-risk for them.

Experts, however, are extremely worried about the impact of marijuana on developing adolescent brains.

Not only that—but there’s one certain kind of marijuana that’s so dangerous that possession of it is a felony. Make sure your kids know this, because if one of their friends pulls it out, they’ll want to run for the hills as fast as they can.

marijuana

My grim conversation with the police officer

When I interviewed a police officer to get information for this article, he told me in grim terms that the form of marijuana called “wax” (also known as “dabs” or “hash oil”) is especially dangerous for teens and adults due to its exorbitantly high THC level.

It’s so dangerous that possession of even a tiny amount of it is a felony.

All teens who use marijuana, or who have friends who use marijuana, need to google the word “felony” to understand the prison term that results from this—even for first offenses, even for juveniles.

This is one of the strongest arguments there is for being extremely careful who you get into a car with.

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How to Skyrocket the Growth of Your Teen’s Brain

In Just Minutes

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Dr. Charles Fay of LoveandLogic.com is an expert at helping parents grow a teen’s brain by leaps and bounds—while helping adults enjoy a less stressful, more fun family life.

teen's brain

Dr. Fay recently said this on the subject of growing a teen’s brain:

“At Love and Logic®, we believe that kids are best prepared for the real world when we allow them to do as much thinking as possible. It’s good practice for the real world, and it keeps the monkey off of our backs most of the time. Here’s the problem. Do you know kids who like to keep adults doing all of the thinking? Do you know kids who are good at tricking us into doing so?”

One strategy for staying out of this trap is to use plenty of questions.

“The more questions we ask,” Dr. Fay says, “the better thinkers our kids will become.”

Why does this strategy work for growing a teen’s brain?

The human brain naturally seeks closure. When we ask a lot of sincere, good-hearted questions with genuine interest and empathy, it’s like we flip a switch in a teen’s brain that keeps him or her groping through possible answers. Sometimes for long after we’ve left the room.

Dr. Fay says that if we do this, our teen’s brain will have “less energy left over for power-struggles.”

Exactly what tired parents long to hear.

If you’re looking for ways to grow your teen’s brain while doing a lot less mental heavy lifting yourself, try using variations on these great Dr. Charles Fay questions:

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Forget Being Supermom—Just be “Good-Enough Mom.”

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Psychologist Dr. Henry Cloud, co-author of the life-changing Boundaries books and The Mom Factor, says that today’s moms will do more good for their families by giving up “the Supermom model of motherhood, which never worked anyway,” and instead relaxing into being a “good-enough mom.”

Why would a psychologist suggest that just being a “good-enough mom” is a healthy idea?

good enough mom

“Perfectionistic mothers,” Cloud says, “tend to either go crazy or make their spouse, their kids, or their kids’ spouses crazy. Stop trying to be the perfect mom, and be content with being a ‘good-enough’ mom.”

What is a “good-enough mom”?

According to Cloud, the “good-enough mom” (the one who’s most likely to raise healthy kids and teens) has these characteristics:

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Happiest College Breaks Start With These Boundaries

Kindly and Firmly Establish These Expectations Ahead of Time

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As a parent, you want to make your kid’s future college breaks as warm and memorable as possible. But will you be able to do that if your newly-flown offspring comes home snarly and inconsiderate?

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What if your newly minted college student decides to stay out until all hours on his or her first night home, and you toss and turn and lose sleep until 3:00 a.m. because you’re worried there’s been a car accident?

What if your child brings home overnight guests without asking—as though your house is his own?

What if your new “adult” college student decides to spend the entire break watching TV and playing video games—while you take care of all the grocery shopping, meal prep, serving, decorating, cleaning, and snow removal that keeps your household running smoothly?

Will this make for a warm, memorable college break for you, Mom?

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